Junk Mail

In my last blog, I complained about the junk mail that I receive for donation requests, but the worst junk mail is from vendors.  I am constantly reminded of the mistake that I made in renting the small post office box.  I have discovered that postal employees are deviously clever putting mail into boxes that are over full.  On several occasions, I was tempted to push the mail back, in hopes of them rearranging it so that I could manipulate  it to come out the front.

This bad decision that I’ve made a few years ago, has caused me to called customer service departments and plead with them to stop sending catalogs.  These companies don’t seem to realize that there a people out there that only want to buy one item once and will never ever deal with them again.  But, they are so hopeful that they send you a catalog month after month.

I was so delighted that I got a warning on one of my catalogs that told me that unless I order soon from them, they will stop sending me their catalog.  That was two years ago.   I am ever hopefully that they will honor their threat.

I check my post office box once a week.  I would do it more often, if there were ever anything other than junk.  To be honest, I did get a Christmas Card from my sister.  For some reason, the word has gotten out that I turned old.  I somehow squandered my youth.  And, as a result, there are companies that think I need supplemental Medicare insurance, life insurance, hearing aids, and auto insurance.

In addition to the junk mail, I get spam telephone calls about my extended warranty on a 14 year old vehicle.  My favorite spam call is when they ask for someone (just make up any name) and after you tell them that person doesn’t live here, they say, “Well maybe you can help me.”  I’m not as quick as I used to be and before I can explain that I can’t help them, they are rattling off a script and you can’t get a word in edgewise.  All I can think about is losing my cellphone minutes.  So now, I say, “So? You are looking for Joe?  Hang on a minute, he’s in the bathroom.  I’ll go get him.”  And then hang up.  The best feature on my cellphone is the ability to block a caller.

I’ve spent a lifetime listening to people demanding unreasonable things.  The best part of retirement is deciding who you are going to talk to on the telephone.  My staff always turned the worst calls over to me to handle.  Let face it, I  don’t want their time taken up with unreasonable people, when they have customers who need their attention.  I would love to volunteer to help with the phones at my local shelter, but I am afraid that my governor quit working.  That’s why I blog.